Boy was I a fool to think that we where really friends. It all started when Alex( hubby) and Carlos started play football on the same team. They would play football, while I would watch on the side lines like any wife would do. Well Carlos Girlfriend Julie did the same thing. It went on for awhile. Then once I got pg with Lil' G. things changed Julie got pg with Carlos Jr, and we started hanging out, we would have dinner at each others house, Julie and I would scrap book together, Carlos and Alex work together. I always thought that they where friends, and not friends because they work together. Like true friends, not just friends that make you think they are your friend just to keep it all cool. Over the last 5 years, we have go camping, and fishing with them. Somewhere along the lines, the friendship that I thought we had went away. Maybe i was blind and it was never there, maybe Julie and Carlos where our friends because the men work together? I only wonder. I always thought that Lil' G and Carlos Jr, would grow up and be best of friends. They love each other, and love playing together. Despite whats going on with there family's. See Julie has an issue with Alex's drinking, and well i don't blame her. I do to, but she cant keep Alex, and Carlos from drinking. They both are grown men, and if they want to drink they are going to no matter who is around. It was never really that way. Until Julie Divorced her ex many years after thy broke up. She made it all legal about a year or so ago. Just around the same time she went back to work. That is about when it all started going down hill. I want to hang with them like we used to, but once im around them. They make you feel like crap. I have since then wondered if Alex and Carlos no longer worked together, if things would still be the same, or if we would just go our separate ways. I hope that for the kids, that they stay around, Lil' G loves Carlos Aka Car Car, that's what she has always called him. So after thanksgiving my eyes started to open a little more about it all. We had invited them over for dinner. No call no show. I sent Julie a few emails, asking if they where coming. No hard feelings if they did not show. I understand it was kind of last minute but still. Just a yes, or no would have worked. Nothing, not-ta nothing at all. So once again what is one supposed to think?

Last year we went camping again, but this time we got two separate camp sights, and well we where supposed to hang out, and feel like we where camping together. Never happened, what did happen was the Julie, and Carlos had there family at there spot, and Alex and i had our family at ours. Once again, if there was no beer involved would things be different?This year, though there will be no more camping with them. Im just not going to open my heart up, put it on the line, for someone to walk all over it. Its just a waste. Maybe things are not what I thought they where. We shall see with the new year coming up. i feel that its ok for Alex to drink while camping. Its his little break from it all. After all he does work six days a week, to support Lil' G and I. i think that camping is a great time to unwind, and take a break from it all. After all hes not drinking and driving, and im around to take care of Lil' G. Oh and hes not an abusive drunk either. He hardly ever gets drunk. Its more like his beer is our water. I know its weird.